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Proteau's Blog: Potty training

Adam Proteau
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The Hockey News
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Proteau's Blog: Potty training

Adam Proteau
By:
• Lightning coach John Tortorella was at his colorful best Tuesday after the Bolts blew a 3-1 lead and fell 5-4 to the Maple Leafs in Toronto.

In describing Tampa's world-class meltdown late in the second period, Tortorella used an allegory that really shouldn't be printed anywhere children and the easily-shocked can see. Let's just say the Lightning might be adding adult diapers to their uniforms for the next few games.

“It's unacceptable," said Tortorella. "And to give up a two-on-nothing, on a power play, last minute of the second period, is absolutely ridiculous. We'll continue this losing streak until we learn to have a little bit of mental toughness and understand situational hockey…we (expletive) our pants as far as situational hockey in that second period. And it's just unacceptable.”

• Don't look now, but here come the New York Rangers.

The Blueshirts have notched points in 10 of its last 11 games. Not so coincidentally, Martin Straka has seven goals and 12 assists in that span. At age 34, the smallish Czech is on pace to set career-highs in goals (44) and points (101). Thanks, Jags.

• Give Round 1 of the Ray Emery/Dominik Hasek showdown to the kid.

Emery stopped 43 of 45 shots and had an amazing .956 save percentage Tuesday night, while Hasek allowed three goals on 22 shots for an unamazing .864 save percentage. I'm still betting Ottawa goes further than Detroit in the playoffs.

• Hockey phrases I hate, Pt. 1: “Lit the lamp”. Makes it sound like players are more into home décor than scoring goals.

• Every time I take a shot at the New Jersey Devils and their monotonous, anti-entertaining style of play, I get e-mails from livid fans. And while I can understand their counter-arguments – mainly, that winning is the most entertaining thing any team can do – they certainly haven't been able to convince their fellow fans of the same thing.

To wit: Tuesday night, the Devils drew 11,156 to East Rutherford to see the Eastern Conference-leading Buffalo Sabres. As a matter of fact, more fans showed up in Nashville (12,032) and Miami (13,140). Devils ownership can talk all it wants about the miracle cure the team's new arena will provide, but I'll believe it when I see it.

FEEDBACK:
Hi Adam, Regarding the following from your latest blog: "Hockey phrases I hate, Pt. 1: "Lit the lamp". Makes it sound like players are more into home décor than scoring goals." Here's something that might make you laugh the next time you hear that phrase. We keep scented candles and lighters in our bathrooms. When someone's visit to the room results in an odorous "cloud", we tell them to "light the lamp!". Personally, the hockey phrase I dislike the most is - "puck squirts free". It just doesn't sound good, not at all. ;-) All the best.
- Mari

Hi Adam, I agree with your assessment of the Devils boring hockey style. I couldn't imagine actually having to pay money to go watch there hockey games.
- James Hall

Hockey phrases I hate: "Offside at the line." Where else could someone possibly be offside? I've heard this from so many different play-by-play guys, and I have no clue why.
- Michael Robertson

Hey Adam, on the subject off dumb hockey phrases - the one that makes me laugh is "double-pad stack" when referring to a sliding pad save. Could there be any other type? A three-pad stack maybe? Cheers.
- Terry

Adam, love the column every day. As for weird hockey phrases, one I hear a lot is a player "pumping it into the zone". Sounds kinda pornographic, and disturbing at the same time.
- Matt Sammon
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Proteau's Blog: Potty training