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The AHL's Milwaukee Admirals have announced a special event for their home game this Saturday against Rockford. It's, uh, very unique to the hockey world – and it's something many people won't be clamoring to see again.
Every time you think you've seen it all when it comes to minor professional hockey promotions, some bizarre event – such as the the one in 2011 when the ECHL's Bakersfield Condors held a Charlie Sheen Night – comes along to change your mind. And every so often, a minor pro hockey promotion comes along that makes you wary about seeing it at all.
Such was the case Thursday night when the AHL's Milwaukee Admirals announced that, in an effort to raise awareness for men's health, the team's vice president of Business Development Mike Wojciechowski would undergo a live prostrate exam during their game this coming Saturday against the Rockford Icehogs.
I know, I should've asked you to prepare yourself to hear that type of news.
Listen, there's absolutely nothing wrong with making people aware of men's health issues and with encouraging men to get tested for any potential issues, and the Admirals should be applauded for doing so. But – and I use that word specifically to mean "however" here – the idea of this gentleman having the procedure televised on the JumboTron before thousands of fans just doesn't, uh, sit right with me. You'd hate to think there could be a day where the Admirals stage a "Turn Your Head And Cough" promotion in support of hernia awareness, but now that we've crossed this rubicon, I can't see how they'd say no to it.
Astonishingly, this isn't the first time a live prostate exam has taken place during a minor pro sports event. This past July, the GM of the Myrtle Beach Pelicans, major league baseball's Single-A affiliate of the Texas Rangers, had the test done during the seventh-inning stretch – and while singing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game":
What else is there to say after that? Is there no end to which teams won't go to stand out among the crowd? Can I stop making smart-ass wisecracks now?