In a video that's cryptic if you don't speak Slovakian, it appears Marian Hossa is training to shoot a puck from the top of the stands into an empty net at a Slovakian League game Friday.
Stumbled upon what appears to be a cool video today. We'd know for sure if we spoke Slovakian. What we do know is Marian Hossa tried to score from the top of an arena, hit the Zamboni and felt bad about it.
Have a look and try and decipher this video, which may or may not be a masterpiece:
1. It opens with a voice speaking over a montage of Hossa plays. The guy seems to be talking Hossa up, albeit in a playful, mocking way.
2. The video hypes the Slovakian League's season-opening matchup between HC Kosice and HK Dukla Trencin, which goes down Friday night. It appears Hossa will be there.
3. Dukla's Robert Petrovicky and Dominik Granak (a.k.a. Miroslav Satan crossed with Edward Norton) smugly discuss something over coffee with a few other players in their home barn, Pavol Demitra Ice Stadium. The group agrees on something, which involves Hossa shooting a puck from the top of the stands.
4. Hossa does it and hits the Zamboni instead of the net, spooking the driver. Hossa apologizes in english.
5. The arena has a banner honoring the late Demitra, who passed away in the Lokomotiv crash three years ago and was Hossa's dear friend.
Hm. What else can we decipher? Going back to the source, Reddit, reveals – phew – what appears to be a Slovakian commenter.
The lowdown from 'Mivro':
"It's kinda cheesy, but the point is: tomorrow our league starts and Marian Hossa, will try to shoot a puck from the top of the stands in his hometown stadium to the empty net (75 m/246 feet). He has 3 tries. With every miss he will donate some money for charity."
Sounds about right. We'll take your word for it, Mivro! So Marian Hossa will likely attempt to shoot a puck from the stands into the empty net. Should be fun.
Actually, maybe we should dig deeper. Here's the Google Translation from the Slovak Extraliga website (forgive the grammatical lapses, and don't shoot the messenger):
"Marian Hossa waiting for Friday challenge . During the first -league round match between HC Dukla Trenčín and Košice attempts to score a goal najkurióznejší his career , from the highest point of the Winter Stadium bleachers Pavel Demitra .
Chicago elite winger in the NHL will have three chances . The puck will try to put into the goal from the 75 - meter distance , while the highest point of the viewing stands . Informed the club through its media campaign "Also Dukla " , which includes former club legend , but current successful Slovak hockey players . Among others supported it and Miroslav Satan , Dominik Graňák , Rastislav Pavlikovský , Zdeno Chara , Marian Gaborik and Marian Hossa right .
Trenčíners up their Friday match against champion in a new guise , while the traditional yellow and red color of their jerseys last week officially added Alternative white. The current choice of coach Romana Stantien under the castle Matus Cak after sixteen years will also present Branko Radivojevic , together with Richard Lintner will play for Dukla few duels at the beginning of the new year .
Start the match between Trenčín and Košice was originally scheduled for 17.30 , the agreement of both clubs but the Referee puts up the initial face-off at 19.00."
Case closed. Slovakian readers, if you're out there – share more revelations about this video in the comments!
Matt Larkin is an associate editor at The Hockey News and a regular contributor to the thn.com Post-To-Post blog. For more great profiles, news and views from the world of hockey, subscribe to The Hockey News magazine. Follow Matt Larkin on Twitter at @THNMattLarkin